Motherhood Guilt

mugAs I mentioned in a previous post, these last weeks of school are manic.

Now because of this, I have done somethings wrong, forgotten things, and not done things.

Years previously, I would have been wracked with guilt and felt a failure as a mother, but I am over that now.

These are things that have been un-super-motherly of me.

  1. Didn’t attend my boys’ sports day – was at work training
  2. Only attended half of my girls’ sports day – had to work and I sat down to watch, not run around and cheered – I had been up since 5.00 to work, I couldn’t of cheered if I tried!
  3. We have had McDonalds for dinner on numerous occasions.
  4. Forgot to take ballet costumes to the full dress rehearsal, but did race back home and get them, and embarrassed my baby girl so much as I raced back in, in a fluster – she couldn’t look at me!
  5. Left my children at home alone for 45 mins, whilst I attended a school event.
  6. Left the guitar performance early (as soon as my boy had played) much to his embarrassment, but honestly listening to other peoples’ children playing the guitar badly, is not a life requirement.
  7. Sent my daughter to sports day in my t-shirt, that keep slipping off her shoulder, as it was the only red one we had and I wasn’t racing out on a Sunday to buy one.
  8. Said no to a messy craft activity, as I had just cleaned and we are getting ready for a big party this weekend and I want as less mess as possible.
  9. Said NO – to my baby girl going to a disco and working at the disco – couldn’t manage it, clashed with dress rehearsal.
  10. Bought myself a big bag of Maltesers and didn’t share them – after these last few weeks, I needed them for my health and sanity.
  11. Got a bit tired, cross and yelled a bit too much.

Why don’t I feel guilty anymore? Well, because over the years I have realised that I cannot do it all, I am not a Super Mother.  All I can do is my best.  At the end of the day, I am a good woman.  I am not perfect by any means, but my intentions are good. I do not sit down and watch daytime TV and drink tea all day – I run as fast as I can to do all the things I need to do.

So if things get forgotten, not done, and I say No more than I used to – well, that’s just life, my darling children and your old enough now to just suck it up and understand!   And any mother tutting me for not living up to the Super Mother code, well look around and you will see the majority of other mothers in just the same boat as me, coping as best we can and doing the best we can – we just need to admit it to ourselves and know that the “Super Mother” is a myth!


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